How Do I Bring This up to family?

Hey ladies,

 Looking to see if you had any advice on how to approach this topic with family, especially parents? I know a lot of women just go ahead and do it, and then tell people once they notice it themselves, but there is a part of me that wants to tell my mom pre-op. I know she's going to be upset about it and think I'm only doing this because I bodybuild, despite the fact that I've wanted to get a BA for years, just never really talked about it much. I hate keeping secrets, but I don't know a good way to breach the topic with her. Anybody been in a similar situation and have any advice?

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  • I told my sisters on our weekend getaway. They were fine with it but said they loved me even with my Itty bitties and just wanted me to be safe. I told my good friend, who e I carpool with because I wasn't going to be able to drive for six weeks - she was happy for me and has helped me over the weeks, I told my kids the night before my surgery--I didn't want them stressing for weeks, they were just happy we didn't announce we were having another baby 😂. I haven't said anything to anyone else. If it comes up later I will deal with it but for now my circle who knows is small. 

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  • I’m in the same boat. I really want to tell my parents because I don’t like keeping secrets, plus I feel like they might be more unhappy if they do find out AFTER the fact. But I’m worried that if I tell them before that they will try to talk me out of it (which I know won’t work, but it will still make me feel shitty and doubt my choices) 

    I’m leaning toward just not telling them. I know they won’t approve either way, but at least I can focus on what I want from my BA without their input and negativity in my head.

    plus, my parents are so passive aggressive that they may just never say anything about it anyway, and it’s a conversation I’m fine with avoiding 😂

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  • I told my mom a week or so before mine. She took it well and told me congrats. I told my kids after I got home from surgery. My oldest is a worrier and I didn’t want that on his mind all day. I didn’t tell my in-laws bc it wasn’t their business and I honestly didn’t care what their opinion was. 

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  • Hi, I’m keeping my BA to myself. Only my husband knows. My family’s is very judgmental and would talk negatively if I were to tell them. All my sisters have bud natural breasts as it is. So they have always laughed at me and put me down and called me mosquitoes bites. I am not telli my in laws because they believe altering your body is an insecurity and a “dumb” thing to do. I did tell my best friend though which helps a bit. So the only people that know is my hubby and best friend. During my breast feeding days I was a D cup and now that I stopped my breast became saggy and small again. I was wearing two bras double padding. Now that I have my BA done I’m hoping no one suspects it but time will tell. Sorry! I had to get this off my chest. This bust mob community is a life saver for me ❤️ good luck on your journey and family! I pray it goes well!

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      • Lila Jean
      • And the journey continues....
      • Lila_Jean
      • 2 mths ago
      • 1
      • Reported - view

      Rose hey!!! I thought i was the only one that got the "mosquito bites" comments!!! 🦟🦟

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    • Rose thank you! It sounds like your in-laws may have the same opinion as my parents. The only people that know so far are my boyfriend and one of my good friends.

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      • Rose
      • rose_22
      • 2 mths ago
      • Reported - view

      Elzbieta Gabija it sucks that they are narrow minded about the idea but at the end of the day it’s my body and my decision. If it comes out then oh well but I’ll keep it to myself for now. I’m sorry about your parents being that way. Support is always good and I’m glad I have it with the person that matters the most which is myself and husband 

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  • I told my mom. She explained that she was supportive but concerned. I explained all the research I had done, all the questions I asked my PS, and how much I felt getting the BA would be beneficial to me mentally. I even told her my husband was supportive but couldn’t care less if I chose not to get them so she would know it truly was my decision. She was a little hesitant at first but after a few long talks she felt better and was backing me 100%. Just be honest and be ready for questions about it. 

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    • Alicia
    • 5'2" - 215 - BWD: 14 - 38B to 40D / 650cc Mentor Smooth Round HP Silicone - Dual Plane - Crease Incision - 12/20/18
    • Alicia
    • 2 mths ago
    • 1
    • Reported - view

    I expected judgement when I told my mom but she was surprisingly supportive. She just wanted to be there with me at the hospital and care for me post op. I stayed with my mom for the first week following surgery.. couldn't have gotten through it without her. But then again, most of her sisters have had BA's over the years so it wasn't so off the wall when I told her that I was getting one. 

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  • I told my mom when I was setting up consults and my in laws too actually - mainly because I need their help with the kids if I go through with it.  My mom is super supportive and said to go for it, especially while i'm "young" enough to enjoy them.  My in laws are concerned for my health and going through surgery but ultimately love me and want me to be happy.  

    I just need to figure out if I actually want to do it.  Second thoughts and surgery is scheduled for August 30....

    Reply Like 1
  • The struggle is real with this post. My boyfriend and best friends knew because I told them before hand. I told my mom after the fact because I didn’t want her to be concerned about the things that could go wrong, so as soon as I was like 5 days post op and everything was good I told her. Like someone else said, I also didn’t want her to try to talk me out of it. I’m sure she’d suggest using the money for student loan debt or generally saving it etc. She wouldn’t have been able to convince me and that would have made our interaction awkward and unpleasant. She was super accepting and wanted to see before and afters lol I got 400s and for my body type I can hide them pretty well. I think what I fear the most is going swimming with my mother in law. She’s coming to visit and it’s so hot here, we’ll definitely go for a swim at some point. She’s observant and isn’t scared to call me out. I’m never going to hear the end of it 😂 Your mom is going to love you no matter what, obviously. Might want to save that conversation for after surgery though. That’s what I did and it worked out well. I personally couldn’t not tell my mom. We’re tight and it would have to come out eventually 🤷🏼‍♀️

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    • BoobNazi This was so helpful, thank you! I may tell her that it is something I'm looking into and leave it at that for now. I won't tell her that I already have a surgeon picked out and a surgery date set.

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  • Ugh, I am almost 2 months post op and my mom still doesn’t know, I have been wearing baggy shirts and avoiding her ☹️ She is a very nervous and paranoid person and has an autoimmune disease and believes with all her heart that breast implant disease is a very real thing and that I will 100% get it. I am kind of waiting for them to drop more and look more natural and I will tell her I got fat injections.. it’s crazy but she is a little crazy. But very stressful on me to lie, I wouldn’t suggest anyone keeping it to themselves for to long... good luck to you ❤️

    Reply Like 1
  • I told my aunt because I knew I would need her help with my son (shes my only family in the state) and she kind of started stressing and spinning out of control. I didn't go into too many details just that I did a lot of research on the procedure and my surgeon and I feel totally comfortable with my decision. Kind of just told her in a way that stayed clearly, I know what I'm doing with my body and I'm just telling you because you're my family not because I need advice or opinion. 

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  • It never even occurred to me to tell my mom. I told my aunt because she had a BA years ago and I had questions. She actually flew in to help with the kids after my surgery. My mom noticed in pictures (she lives out of state) and asked me. Actually, that’s how most people found out, through seeing pictures lol I only told those that NEEDED to know beforehand. 

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